Many of the opposite gender fear the phrase "let's talk" because that usually means that they've either done something wrong or something they won't agree with is about to take place. It is usually a heads up that something they won't completely agree with will take place.
Tennen's explainations make sense to me especially the one about the anniversary cake. Women are more emotional and base events, thoughts, and everything else on feelings while men on the other hand are think of things in a more practical term.
Women are more attuned to metamessages than men. They seem to want to connect everything to a feeling or a special moment. It's hard for them to just take something for what it is they always feel like there needs to be something deeper or there has to be a purpose to everything while men on the other hand see things for exactly what it is most of the time.